This is not a deep-dive analysis. Just a frustrated Arsenal fan writing to get some steam off.
I had a recent article stating Arteta isn’t the man to bring the glory days back to Arsenal. Actually, thinking about it, my article “Unpopular Opinion: Arteta is the right man for today but not the man to bring back the glory days!” is pretty much what is happening now. Yes, I am padding my shoulder. Go read it. It’s nothing surprising to be honest. Most Arsenal fans that watch football always knew deep inside that Arteta isn’t the right man. His narrative was the only thing going for him. Everyone that thinks he is some tactical mastermind is just simply blind.
There is nothing that makes me think that he will be successful.
Now, who will save us?
Erik Ten Hag – I won’t talk much about him. Was always my second choice after Nagelsmann. After Nagelsmann went to Bayern I knew he’d never come so here we are. Please come Mr. Ten Hag. And if you’re at it, bring Gravenberch and Antony with you. Is that too much to ask?
Graham Potter – Best English Manager out there. His teams have something that’s called “control”. Yes, they can control a game. I know… We Arsenal fans think playing only for the opening 15 minutes or the last 15 minutes when we’re trailing is normal but guess what? It’s not!!! With Arsenal’s squad, he’ll have way more fun. So please come Mr. Potter and while you’re at it bring Lamptey and Bissouma with you, we could do with some squad depth. Thank you.
Unai Emery – Oh wait… Nevermind.
Valverde – I think it will be like Sarri at Chelsea. Good Coach but will never be liked and is pretty old but as an interim why not. He’ll do better than Arteta I’m sure.
Lucien Favre – Again, better than Arteta but far from pleasing. So, I’d give it a solid 3/10.
Zidane – Call Ian Wright to call Wenger to call Viera to call Henry to call Zidane and convince him.
Jesse Marsch – Decent interim choice. Will get us playing intense football at least but won’t save us.
Pep Guardiola – Pep you’re the best tactician ever. But to be truly the GOAT you have to prove yourself with Arsenal. You’re welcome.
Jürgen Klopp – I know you believe in wahre Liebe (true love), you found it in Germany and also in England. But everyone can have a divorce once. So, divorce right now and come to the prettier side of England that is London. I’ll prepare the divorce papers.
Thomas Tuchel – You know you’ll be sacked someday. It’s fucking Chelsea. We will never sack you.
Mourinho – The only one where I genuinely believe it could get worse
Gasperini – Good choice. Plays exciting football. He plays very bravely, sometimes to a fault. He just throws everything upfront. I believe Arsenal fans won’t like him in the long-term though.
Roberto Martinez – He plays like Burnley with the Belgian National Team. Do I need to remind you what players they have?
Ralph Hassenhuttl – The child that isn’t loved as much because he isn’t as good as them. All the managers that have received guidance from Ragnick… Klopp, Tuchel, oh and Hasenhuttl. At least he knows how to press.
Arsene Wenger – I feel sorry for what he had to go through in his last years. Have some rest and watch over us please Mr. Wenger.
To Edu. If you are truly a good director in the making prove yourself now. Sack Arteta now. If you don’t, you’re either delusional or you value your relationship with Arteta more than Arsenal’s well-being. Either way, you can go then.
To Josh Kroenke. We get it. You’re a good speaker. We get it. You want to bring Arsenal to the top. We get it. You’re ready to spend money. Then throw everything you have to Erik Ten Hag and escort him with one of your private jets.
To all Arsenal fans. Let’s stay respectful to all parties involved and show some class. If I see anything in the likes of death threats to anyone involved again, (insert Liam Neeson voice):” I will find you!” In all seriousness, we are all suffering so please voice your opinions in a somewhat respectful manner.
Follow me on Twitter. @perixx99
COYG!